Wheelchair Worries - Sorry, you'll have to use the Gatehouse theatre toilet

"Every Monday I attend

ANDYSMANCLUB at Stafford Rugby Club"

It's free to attend, runs from 6:45pm-9pm, there's even free biscuits and (sometimes) free pastries. Rolling through the doors for the first time was incredibly daunting but something I'm glad I did as it's helped a lot and I've made some good friends there. I've been going for about 14 months and I urge anyone who's considering attending to push through any anxiety/apprehension as everybody is so welcoming and I guarantee you will feel better having got things off your chest. It gives you a different perspective of your issue(s) when you say it out loud to people rather than to yourself in your own head. Well it does for me anyway, I'm often realising that what seemed like a much bigger issue in my head, isn't when I try to explain it.

I have built up a good friendship with them and it was suggested we meet up at The Empourium on Monday 29th December as AMC would be closed for the Christmas holidays. I was quite looking forward to it, it would be a chance to have a few drinks with friends - something I don't do very often nowadays.

DRINKING ESTABLISHMENT watch 

Everything is on one level. The floor is wood, there is acres of room to get up to the bar. It wasn't particularly busy while I was here, but there was plenty of room in front of the bar and the bar was very very wide. I'd imagine they could fit about a dozen bar staff. There are a few pool tables, darts, crazy golf, shuffleboard,  Bowling and Table Tennis.

The Empourium 4/5: 

The Empourium

I was one of the first to arrive and their were two of the AMC lads sitting at a table. I had arrived at the same time as one of the other members so we both went to the bar to get a drink. 

The bar man spoke to me to take my order. 
"Well duh" you're thinking. "Of course he spoke to you, most bar staff do! They need to find out what you want to order."
True, but for the purposes of this post, it's quite important that he acknowledged me and my situation before I bought a drink. He leaned over the bar so that I could reach the contactless pay point.
He was definitely aware I was in a wheelchair.

We went back to the table, which was by the door, a door that we found out stays wide open unless somebody closes it - which nobody does, we,  push the door open like a saloon door or pull it open and expect it to shoot behind us. It was bloody freezing - Most pubs have two doors or the external door on a lever so it automatically closes.

I was drinking bottles rather than pints as I'd drunk a lot this Christmas and there was more to come. As I said in my previous post I'm getting old. I can't even finish a pint without a pit stop. I said I was going to the toilet and one of the people I was with said
"erm, I think the only toilet's might be upstairs."

I've stopped asking if there is a disabled toilet in pubs and restaurants as just about everywhere has them nowadays, but I can't help but stress about it until I know for sure.

Source: No Wheelchair Worries At Hogarths

I went up to the bar to ask the bar staff where the toilets are.
"We haven't got a disabled toilet, sorry. We were let down by the builder."
I waited for the solution I was sure he'd offer. He'd served me when I came in, surely he'd noticed then that I was in a wheelchair and I wasn't going to be able to get to the toilets. Surely he realises that this is an essential requirement when serving people beer?

One of the guys I was with said "you could go to the Gatehouse."
I was furious. Not with my friend, but that this solution wasn't offered by the barman. Furious I wasn't warned before I bought the drink. Furious that he had tried to blame it on being let down.

So off I went. Two hundred yards up the road to use the toilet in another establishment. As I was leaving The Gatehouse to return to The Empourium I bumped into the manager who had personally helped me a few months previously when I went to watch Milton Jones. She was incredibly helpful then and told me I could pop back and use their facilities whenever I needed to. 

I returned to our table by the seemingly permanently open door. I returned for about twenty minutes and with an almost empty bottle of beer in front of me I needed to visit The Gatehouse...AGAIN! It was now raining. It wasn't even nine o'clock yet but I wasn't very enthusiastic at the prospect of getting wet every time I went to the loo, so I phoned my Dad and asked him to come and get me.

There are two entrances to The Gatehouse. The main entrance (which has steps) and  an entrance with a ramped access (about ten yards further down). On this occasion the automatic door decided not to slide open. I could see the lights on the sensor change from green to red, I presumed 'red' meant it wasn't going to open but I also assumed it was due to my position/stature. There was a group of people walking past, I called out - slightly panicked as I hadn't planned for this delay. A guy broke away from the pack to come and activate the sensor for me. It didn't work for him either. So he went to the entrance and opened the door from the other side.

"Thanks!" I called out as I whizzed past him.

I hope he didn't think I was being rude and didn't seem sufficiently thankful for his help. I was veery grateful, but the situation was critical by then.

DRINKING ESTABLISHMENT watch 

I've updated Empourium's rating to 1 out of 5. All of the positive points I mentioned previously still stand but when you're expected to go elsewhere to go to the toilet...

The Empourium 1/5: 

**********

A new bar featuring interactive darts and a shuffleboard table is set to open tonight in Stafford. 

The bar opens at noon and will also host games such as beer pong, pool, and table tennis. An extension upstairs featuring a nine-hole crazy golf course and bowling alley will be opening at the end of November.

Source: Staffordshire Live - 11th November-2022 

I visited The Empourium a little over three years since it opened. So I was curious by what was meant when the barman said they were let down. Surely they were able to find somebody else to install a wheelchair accessible toilet in the years since? Have they tried to install a disabled toilet recently, but something had got in the way? 

"I thought it was a legal requirement to ensure services are accessible?"

I messaged them on Facebook Messenger and they responded within minutes. They confirmed that they don't have disabled toilets. I enquired further and asked
"I thought it was a legal requirement to ensure services are accessible?"
"It is not a legal requirement no as it is an old building/structure." They replied.

I know this to be true if the building in question is a listed building. Grade 2 listed buildings are allowed to install disabled toilets, but it is not a straightforward process. There is something called the equality act which requires reasonable adjustments for disabled access, this does not override the legal protection of historic features, meaning any modifications must respect the building’s character. 

This building didn't look old enough to be listed however. For example, I know the Soup Kitchen is listed because to get into the building they had to get a portable ramp out from a cupboard, they told me they wanted to install a permanent structure but had been denied planning permission because it was a listed building.

I wasn't convinced this was a listed building so I checked it on historicengland.org.uk. As I suspected it wasn't listed. It's not even an historic building.

"Based on the available information, the Foregate Street Vintage Emporium in Stafford is listed as having accessible, disabled-friendly facilities. This typically implies the presence of accessible toilets to accommodate visitors with mobility needs, adhering to accessibility standards."

The above is the AI overview when entering the Google search"should the empourium in stafford have disabled toilets".

@fatpigeonsbook 

@fatpigeonsbook

@fatpigeonsbook

Wheelchair Worries - Social Prescribing

I came across this video on YouTube about social prescribing. I'd never heard of social prescribing and thought you only went to the doctors for illness. But it reminded me that many years ago when I was younger and stupider (not much stupider, but I did bump into things more often), I thought "with all this free time, instead of just sitting in front of the telly, why don't I spend it getting in shape.

I'll look like Arnold Schwarzenegger in no time." So I went to the doctors to see if there was a limit to how much I could exercise now that my situation was different.
"Nope. Just take it easy, you haven't done any exercise in a long time. Oh and shelve your ambitions of looking like a former Mr Universe, you numpty." I can't be sure that's exactly how the conversation went, but I'm sure it's along those lines.

The doctor prescribed me exercise and handed me a prescription. Exercise on prescription allowed me to attend participating gyms for free. A new gym had just opened by me and was completely wheelchair accessible. As it turned out some of the exercise bikes had high backed seats, I would be able to cycle as much as I wanted. Unfortunately the bike was stationed directly in front of the telly, and my aspirations of becoming a mini Arnie hit a snag. At least my legs weren't completely immobile while I watched this television, but then I would get home and watch T.V while eating a pack of biscuits.

According to the video, every doctor's surgery has access to a social prescriber.
"Well I bet mine doesn't"
It did.

A social prescriber does exactly what it says on the tin, they prescribe social needs to people. I struggle first of all to get into social situations as it's difficult to get around. I am limited by what I can do and I've isolated myself because of my communication issues. Since I've been attending Andy's Man Club I've realised that my communication issues are largely in my head.

I made an appointment to see Michelle Cotterill, something that I recommend anybody in Stafford to do, and if you're not in Stafford then - as the video says - every doctor's surgery has access to it. She asked me what I wanted to get out of our appointment.

"I want to put myself in social situations again". 

I seemed to exist to the NHS when my brain tumour was fairly recent. They had got me into rehab at Cannock Chase Hospital, rehab at Moor Green, Headway brain injury charity, but as time has gone on offers had dried up. I explained "I find it particularly difficult in groups where there's atmospheric noise, especially large groups or a room where there are several conversations and I have to raise my voice to be heard." 

I liked the idea of using this blog as a reason to travel around. The best way to talk about accessibility is to experience it, but I didn't know how to do it without spending a fortune.

Disabled Persons Railcard

As I said previously, being in a wheelchair has its perks. One third off rail travel for twenty pounds for a year, or fifty-four pounds for three years sounds like a pretty good deal to me. Just make sure you have it with you when you travel. Describing where it is in your bedside table drawer isn't proof enough.You have to be able to prove you are in receipt of at least one of; Personal Independence Payments (PIP), Adult Disability Payment (ADP), Disability Living Allowance (DLA), Child Disability Payment (CDP), have a visual impairment, have a hearing impairment, have epilepsy, receive Attendance Allowance, Severe Disablement Allowance or Pension Age Disability Payment (PADP), receive War Pensioner's Mobility Supplement, receive War or Service Disablement Pension for 80% or more disability or, buy or lease a vehicle through the Motability scheme. If you need to be accompanied by somebody they will also receive the saving. There is always assistance on board if you require it, or you can book assistance. They can help you with a number of things, including:

• offering a helping hand to navigate the station
• help getting on or off the train
• meeting you from your train and taking you to your next train or the exit
• arranging a ramp on or off your train
• assistance relating to a non-visible impairment
• carrying your bag(s) – up to 3 items of luggage

You can't just fake a limp or show your friends Access Card with your thumb conveniently covering the photo ID though.

        For more information go to the website

My Access Card

Access Card
Oh, that reminds me, you should get an access card. This is so you can attend any participating venue and just show your card or quote your ID number when booking tickets online, and they will know what assistance you need. As you can see from the example - there are nine boxes at the bottom of the card. Three of the boxes are filled in signifying that I need level access, I have difficulty moving myself more than short distances 

Clockwise from top left:
Level access, Essential Companions, 
Distance, Standing and queuing,
Urgent Toilet Needs, Assistance Dogs,
Audible Information, Visual information,
Miscellaneous

and it would be significantly difficult to access services without support from another person. There are also six other disabilities you can declare. I had to get mine when booking tickets to see Roger Waters at The Utilita Arena in 2023. I needed it to prove I had a disability - again, a fake limp wasn't proof enough. They wanted proof I needed the chair for transport and didn't want to just be pushed around while sitting in a comfy seat. 

For more information go to the website

Bus, trams and trains pass

Okay, full transparency, this is only for travelling anywhere in the West Midlands. But it's cheaper than the railcard, in fact it's the best kind of cheap. Free! There is a restriction though - it's only free if you travel off peak (09:30 - 23:59), you're going to have to fork out £1.50 if you're an early riser. You can't just turn up to any bus though and demand free travel. You need to book on their website.

For more information go to the website

Travel for free on any bus at any time

Just because you are disabled, doesn't mean you can't travel around the country. In fact you can do it for free.

Have I mentioned perks before?

You can apply for a disabled bus pass from your local council. Disabled bus passes are free although you will have to prove you have the disability you're claiming for. You might be asked to provide a copy of your motability rating from your PIP letter. You may be asked for confirmation by a medical expert. Your council should have a page on their website listing the requirements - For example visit the Stafford Council 'What categories of disability qualify for a disabled pass?'.

The length of time you can hold a pass without having to re-apply depends on your reason for applying. Some people are awarded it on a temporary basis, others permanently meaning you won't have to re-apply for four to five years. All public local bus services in England must be DDA compliant which means they must be wheelchair accessible. The capacity for having wheelchair passengers depends on the model of the bus and the model of the wheelchair(s).

For more information on bus passes in the Stafford area go to the website

Wheelchair taxis

These are an absolute pain to arrange. If you can get out of your chair and sit in the car and your wheelchair will fold up, you will be able to use a taxi service. I would recommend Westside Taxis if you are in the Stafford area. They have an app which has a notes section. This allows you to book the taxi without human interference. For anywhere else there's Uber. Both apps are similar in that you can choose the car size I.E 6 seater, 8 seater, saloon etc and leave notes for the driver I.E "I am an electric wheelchair user but can travel in the passenger seat. Please could you fold it and lift it into the boot, it is quite heavy." Alternatively if you have to stay in your wheelchair then a taxi service isn't for you. I have only found one taxi service that had a wheelchair taxi but you couldn't book it in advance. You had to phone on the day you required it, to check its availability. Not ideal if you've got a hospital appointment in a few days.

Community Link

You might be starting to spot a pattern here, but this is available in Stafford. They will go further afield into mid-staffordshire, but if you need to attend a doctors appointment and public transport is difficult for you, try this service. They provide a wheelchair-friendly transport service for people with mobility difficulties. They're a friendly bunch and there are vehicles specially equipped to help passengers with mobility needs, and if you need a carer to accompany you, they can join you free of charge. There is a small fee for each trip but it's certainly cheaper than a taxi. You must be a member, the membership form is very simple and quick to fill out. Once you've completed that you can book a wheelchair taxi to your heart's content.

To become a member click here.

They are always on the lookout for volunteer drivers and passenger assistants. If this is something you're interested in then click here.

Airport assistance

You can read about my experience with airport assistance here. It was brilliant and completely took the stress out of catching a plane. Once we had checked in, we went to a desk and were given a small electronic device that would bleep when we needed to come back to the desk ready to board. We were free to do what we wanted until then. We went and got breakfast and we were able to go in the empty special assistance lounge rather than the packed Weatherspoon's. When it was close to departure time, our electronic device beeped, and we were taken to the gate. 

There was one problem here. The transport wasn't wheelchair friendly. People who had mobility issues got a lift. We walked behind, with my Dad pushing the wheelchair in the slip stream of the transport. 

We were delivered to the gate, passed through security and were then taken to what looked like a mobile storage unit. A scissor lift lifted me up and I and the other special assistance customers had a small ride to the plane. The mobile storage unit got as close to the plane as possible so I could just wheel aboard.

For more information go to the CAA (Civil Aviation Authority) website.

Bond Hotel, Blackpool

Hotel's sometimes declare a room as disable friendly to fulfill a legal responsibility, but the room is in no way appropriate. Take my experience in France for example. It was a lovely hotel, but it had clearly been designed for able bodied people. They thought that all they needed to do was put a couple of grab rails in and remove the shower screen to make it disabled friendly.

The Bond Hotel has been designed with the sole intention of making most rooms fully accessible. Most rooms have an en-suite wet room, widened doors, grab rails, lots of floor space, hoists, a wide range of mobility equipment available on request (and free of charge) and a 24-hour manned emergency call system. Their rooms are spread across three with a choice of single.

Their is a restaurant, bar and cabaret area inside the hotel - all fully accessible. They'll even help arrange your travel and pick you up from your house. As the hotel is in Blackpool there is plenty to see and do and pretty much all public transport is wheelchair accessible.

For more information go to the website

RADAR key
I hate having to a use a toilet in a publicly used bathroom. Men are... sorry men can be, disgusting creatures. Having to sit on a toilet seat that men have tried to miss while aiming for the large hole in the middle, fills me with dread. All over the UK there are 10,000+ disabled toilets behind a locked door. You can only get an officially authorised RADAR key from here. The key is only available to National Disability and Carers Card holders which you can purchase from the site. This will to skip queues to use facilities that may not be clean or adapted to your needs. Some accessible countryside gates require a RADAR Key for access. They often feature an "H" frame with a rectangular enclosure for use by mobility scooters and wheelchair users.

For more information go to the website.

@fatpigeonsbook

@fatpigeonsbook

Wheelchair Worries - Andy's Man Club - It's Okay To Talk

Back in November, I thought, it's been quite a long time since my tumour, I should probably show my face and remind people I'm still alive. My insecurities and desire to avoid people, had just been a way to avoid life. But getting back into life isn't so easy after a long period of dodging it. I'm forty-two now, so I think that's mission accomplished, time for this old dog to learn some old (but new to him) tricks. Fortuitously, I received a text from my GP surgery. Their annual Community Mental Health Event was being held at Stafford Rangers Social Club. I'd been there a few times and knew it had excellent access. My main worry had already been dealt with, I knew it had wide corridors, smooth floors, a big function room and everything was on one floor.

As I had only been thinking about doing something like this for many minutes, had I manifested it? Or was it just pure coincidence?
Probably the latter.
If I were you, I wouldn't cancel those tickets for Paul McKenna's next tour. I think there's more to manifesting than just having a bit of a think.

I stuck to the idea of attending rather than making up some reason why I should take the easy way out and not go. I booked a taxi and then cancelled it immediately as my Dad said he could take me. We got to Stafford Rangers and Dad got out to get the chair and assumed I would expect him to push me around in there.
"No thanks, I'd rather go in on my own". I said.
I'd got my big boy pants on today! 💪

I wheeled myself in, self conscious of the fact that other people in wheelchairs seem to just glide along, giving the wheels a little push every few metres. I however, constantly correct my direction and stop the start like an old spluttering car.

Two women at the door greeted me and held the door open, told me to go along the corridor and turn right at the end. There was no issue of access. As I remembered, the floors were flat and smooth and the corridors were wide. I could just glide to the end of the corridor.

Could... but didn't.

Another woman greeted me at the door and told me there was a bar with refreshments to the left. I thanked her and went forth...before doubling back and asking her what do I do. I thought this was going to be a room of people all sitting in rows watching a talk/presentation or two. It wasn't. About fifteen charities had tables around the room with one or two people sat at them. You would talk to a charity that took your interest to get some further information.

I spoke to a few charities, but they wanted me to go for an interview and then wait to see if I'd been selected. Like I'd just applied to college. I didn't like how formal this was, I didn't like that I had to audition and if they deemed me worthy of help, I could attend. Katherine House Hospice were here as well. It was one of the first tables I encountered on my circuit. I was reading the information on the table, just being nosey, when I was approached.
"Can I help you?"
I knew what table I was at and fortunately, had no need for it. I didn't tell him that straight away though and had a chat, I didn't feel comfortable telling him "no thanks" . I thought Katherine House was a small charity that offered end of life care to a select few. It's actually a large charity that has two-hundred employees and six-hundred volunteers. They have a therapy and wellbeing clinic, a lymphoedema clinic, end of life care. It costs them about four million pounds a year, a lot of which is from donations. They rent space in many shops around Staffordshire where you can donate furniture. It's a big machine and a very worthwhile cause. Katherine House Hospice.

One of the first tables I came across was Andy's Man Club. The design of their station caught my attention. It was black with a hand in white making the ok sign. I stopped and a guy came out to talk to me. They are a group of men that meet up every Monday at Stafford Rugby Club for a couple of hours and gives you the chance to chat to a group of people who are all there for the same reason - to talk. I asked how many people go and he said it varies week by week but it could be as many as sixty. Whoah, that's quite a lot I thought. Straight away I was thinking about what it would be like to enter a room where sixty people all turn and look as I slowly wheel into the room, my wheelchair stopping and starting, constantly changing direction. My imagination was was running riot. I started trying to make my excuses for not going.
"I don't think people will be able to understand me, I said"
"We're chatting now and I have no difficulty in understanding you," he replied
"I don't know if I feel comfortable talking in front of that many people."
"There is no obligation to talk, you can just listen and socialise in the breaks. Some weeks I don't say anything, but last week I had a lot to get off my chest and you couldn't shut me up."

So he was a volunteer who attends these meetings himself? He handed me a flyer and I said I'd go. 

And I intended too.
And I did.

The first rule of fight club is you don't talk about fight club.
Oops sorry. 

Same first rule, different club.

The first rule of Andy's Man Club is you don't talk about Andy's Man Club.

I shocked us both and kept to my word. Stafford Rugby Club kindly allow us the use of their facilities. There is loads of parking. There's even lots of disabled spaces which a lot of the time are left free, although there is rugby practice as well and obviously all the disabled spaces get used first. There's always people on the door to open the door for me on arrival, but I have to ask somebody to let me out as the doors aren't automatic. We meet on the first floor, but there is a lift for us mobility challenged folk.

The first time I went the guy I met at the Mental Health Event was there as well, so I wasn't in a room full of strangers. Which I am very appreciative of because I can guarantee I wouldn't have gone again the following weeks otherwise. About fifty people attend. We all sit in a big group, introduce ourselves and then get split up into smaller groups with at least one (but usually two or three) volunteers to head up the group. Oh and gallons of tea, biscuits and one of the members of our group brings a sack of pastries.

I've been going for a few months now and take advantage of the chance to talk to a captive audience. It's right what people say, it really does help to talk. We are always much harder on ourselves when left with just our own imagination. Talking to others gives me the true perspective of other people's opinion of me - which is always different to my own negative view. It's taken me a while to realise that I just try to deflect by attempting to be funny and never really speaking seriously. Andy's Man Club is a great start to my week, there's always somebody who can offer you advice, or quite often they don't offer any thoughts, you just feel better having spoken your thoughts to other people, rather than just thinking them. 

I enjoy going, it's a change of scenery and a good chance to socialise and get things off my chest. I don't think I'm too good at the socialising in breaks. Everybody's talking in a big echoey hall, which makes it hard to be heard.

I'll continue going and work on that though.

Andy's Man Club

@fatpigeonsbook

@fatpigeonsbook